The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have Three Different Names.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, or George or Bill Bailey -
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter -
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum -
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover -
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name
His ineffable effable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.
Cat of the Month ~ June 2009
The Glenturret Distillery, near Crieff in Perthshire, Scotland, is the oldest working Scotch-whisky distillery in England and the home of the world-renowned 'Famous Grouse' whisky. Barley stored in a distillery ready for whisky making is a big attraction for mice, and so for many years Glenturret has kept a cat on the premises. And the name of that cat was Towser.
From 1963 the position of resident mouser was held for almost 24 years by the amazing Towser, a long-haired tortoiseshell female, who had a remarkable mouse-catching career which put her into the Guinness Book of Records as the world's best mouser. Her tally of mice was estimated at four a day for 21 years totalling 28,899 mice in all. The Guinness World Records Book proclaimed her “World Mousing Champion” while 'Animal Planet' lists her among their Top Nine Cats with the headline “Most Ruthless Killer” (“her bloodlust finally satiated, Towser died in 1987?).
Towser died in 1987, and her life and exploits are fondly commemorated by a (now) well worn bronze statue at the 'Famous Grouse Experience' visitor centre on the Glenturret site. Her paw prints are also used to decorate the label on the bottle of the Fairlie's light Highland Liqueur, another of the distillery's products.